Archive - February 3, 2012

伴侶

幾位昔日的美國同事傳來祝賀訊息,其中一位:「嗨,秋瑩,恭喜妳出新書,雖然我一個字也看不懂,但照片上的人我都認得^-^…..。」 

這信讓我想到,身旁那個也看不懂我的書的人,雖然不懂我的字,但這人卻始終如一,溫柔、聰穎而堅強地,和我攜手走在育兒這一條路上。想起關於他的一件事。

「有一年,剛從台灣返美的一個早晨,我的信箱裡出現這樣一封信,是先生前夜寫的,看完之後,我留下了淚。徵詢他的同意後,我把這封信譯寫在此:

*****
嗨,只想告訴你,我剛剛在你的部落格上瀏覽著Isaac的照片,那些照片很棒。看著照片中的Isaac,加上聽他說這趟夏天旅程中看過的一些事,讓我再度 想到他有多麼幸運。你讓他那些想看飛機、火車、船和摩托車的夢成真。你讓他有機會和一些很特別的人相處,去認識他們和我們很不一樣的生活。你給了他一些現 在已經成為他生命一部分的經驗,他將用這些經驗去成長。你給了他一些記憶,這些不論是能被具體記起、或者已經融入他的精神裡的記憶,將會在可見的未來裡塑 造這個美好的男孩,成為他生命中很特別的一部分。
他很幸運有你這個媽媽帶他去看世界;不論他是處於快樂、悲傷、興奮、好玩、好奇,或其他每天的千百種心情感受中,都有你陪伴在身旁。他和你相處的每一刻絕對是兩個人之間能有的最好的時光─ 既真實又純真的愛。
我很欣慰、也很幸運能參與你和他的這份母子關係—我知道你心中對這份關係有一種很獨特的看待,那是我在其他媽媽身上很少見的。因為我有幸如此貼近你們這份 感情,我的生命也因此而不同,我為那些沒有機會體驗過或擁有這種愛的人感到悲傷。毫無疑問地我全心愛著Isaac,但你們之間的聯繫是一種非常非常特別的 東西:當他受傷時,全世界沒有人能像他媽媽那樣安慰他、讓一切變得好一些─ 而母親的愛,應該就是這樣的。我愛你!」

(節錄自《與小猴喝茶:一個現代母親與兒子的甜蜜教養關係》)

(下為書中略去的原文)
Hi – just wanted to say I was looking at the pictures of Isaac on Tea With Monkey. These pictures are wonderful. Looking at Isaac’s face in those pictures and hearing him talk about some of his memories of the things he was able to see on your trip this summer makes me remember how lucky he is. You made some of his dreams about seeing planes and trains and boats and motorcycles come true. You’ve allowed him to spend time around very special people and understand the way they live their lives so differently from ours. You’ve given him experiences that are now part of himself that he will use to grow, and memories that whether specifically recalled or just embodied in his spirit, will shape this wonderful boy for years to come.
He is so lucky to have you as his mom to show him the world and be there for him when he is happy, sad, excited, playful, curious and all of the thousands of other things he feels every day. His time with you must be the best that a person can have with another person – true and pure love.
I am happy and lucky to be near this relationship between mother and son in my life – its something I know you have uniquely in your heart that I don’t see from most moms. Because I have seen it so close now, my life is different than if I hadn’t and I’m sad for those people who have not seen or had this type of love. Of course I love Isaac with all of my heart also but there’s something very very special about the way you and he are joined. When he gets hurt there’s no one in the world that can make it better the way his mom can – and this is as it should be.
I am so glad he has you – you are simply the best.
I love you,

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